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(meteorobs) Fwd: jokes





>From: Jokeman <FAQ-JM@lyris.enlist.com>
>Reply-To: Jokeman Joke List <FAQ-JM@lyris.enlist.com>
>To: Jokeman Joke List <FAQ-JM@lyris.enlist.com>
>Subject: jokes
>Date: Mon, 6 Mar 2000 22:17:52
>
>            The Jokeman
>
>Jokes for today
>
>-- Appetizer --
>
>I stayed in a foreign hotel that had no bathroom...
>
>... It was uncanny.
>
>
>
>Support our sponsors, as they support us!
>
>
>* FUN... CONTROVERSIAL... ADDICTIVE... and it's all FREE! *
>Like to Laugh... Like your news a little Bizarre... or do you
>like to be Teased, Brain Teasers that is? See why over
>2,000,000 a day get their news, entertainment and fun
>from ShagMail! The widest selection of topics on the net.
>Visit: http://www.shagmail.com/al/affiliates.cgi?1352
><a href="http://www.shagmail.com/al/affiliates.cgi?1352">
>Go to ShagMail</a>
>
>---------------------------------------------------------
>
>                     ___
>                    (___)
>                   /'      '\
>                  /   /"\   \
>                  \_/o o\_/
>                    (  _  )
>                     ' \ /'
>                   /\\V//\
>                  / /_  _\ \
>                  \ \__ _/ /
>                   \/===\/
>                   ||       ||
>                   ||       ||
>                   ||_ _ _||
>                   |_____|
>                       |||
>                     / Y \
>                      '"'"'
>A little old lady went to the grocery store and put the most
>expensive cat food in her basket. She then went to the
>check-out out counter where she told the check out girl.
>"Nothing but the best for my little kitten. "The girl at the
>cash register said, "I'm sorry, but we cannot sell you cat
>food without proof that you  have a cat.  A lot of old
>people buy cat food to eat, and the management wants proof
>that you are buying the cat food for your cat." The little
>old lady went home, picked up her cat and brought it back to
>the store.
>
>
>                   |\_._/|
>                   | o o |
>                   (  T  )
>                 .^`-^-'^.
>                   `.  ;  .'
>                   | | | | |
>                 ((_((|))_))
>
>They sold her the cat food.
>
>The next day, the old lady went to the store and bought 12
>of the most expensive dog cookies -- one for each day of
>Christmas. The cashier this time demanded proof that she now
>had a dog, claiming that old people sometimes eat dog food.
>Frustrated she went home, came back and brought in her dog.
>
>                             __----_
>                           /##|       \
>                          /###|     |  \___ O
>                         |####|             \
>                         |####|              |
>                         \####/  _____/
>                           \###    /
>                               =====
>                               /        \
>                              |   |_      \
>                             \___/      |
>                             =\         /
>                              _|    |_ |__
>
>She was then given the dog cookies.
>
>
>The next day she brought in a box with a hole in the lid.
>The little old lady asked the cashier to stick her finger in
>the  hole.   The cashier said, "No, you might have a snake
>in there." The little old lady assured her that there was
>nothing in the box that would bite her.  So the cashier put
>her finger into the box  and pulled it out and told the
>little  old lady, "That smells like  crap."
>
>… The little old lady grinned from ear to ear, "Now, my
>dear, can I please buy three rolls of toilet paper?"
>
>                     ___
>                    (___)
>                   /'      '\
>                  /   /"\   \
>                \_/o o\_/
>                   (  _  )
>                    ' \ /'
>                   /\\V//\
>                  / /_  _\ \
>                  \ \__ _/ /
>                   \/===\/
>                   ||       ||
>                   ||       ||
>                   ||_ _ _||
>                   |_____|
>                       |||
>                     / Y \
>                      '"'"'
>submitted by EightyMonte…
>
>______________________________________________________
>
>          !! FREE !! ANIMATIONS !! FREE !!
>
>     FREE Interactive Cartoons and Greeting Cards.
>
><a href=" http://www.oska.com/combo.pht?id=100299 "> Click
>Here </a>
>______________________________________________________
>
>
>Sex is like math...
>Add the bed, Subtract the clothes, Divide the legs, and
>Multiply!
>
>---------------------------------------------------------
>
>What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive?
>
>… Popeye beat the shit out of him…
>
>---------------------------------------------------------
>
>CARTOON OF THE DAY
>Laugh and share it with your friends:
>http://www.localbizwiz.com/haha/default.asp?P=0128&R=0709
>
>---------------------------------------------------------
>
>
>* * Quote-of-the-day * *
>
>The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood
>alcohol level…"
>
>-- RL
>
>---------------------------------------------------------
>
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>
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>
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>
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>
>---------------------------------------------------------
>
>A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She
>stands directly next to the barber chair, while her dad gets
>his haircut, eating her snack cake. The barber says to her,
>"Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on your Twinkie."
>
>  She says, "I know. I'm gonna get boobs too."
>
>SmileyCD
>
>
>---
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