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(IAAC) NON-METEOR HUMOR


[The lists are so quiet lately, I thought a bit of off-topic humor wouldn't 
hurt... Clear skies!  -Lew]

------- Forwarded Message
Date: Fri, 19 Sep 1997 09:15:33 -0400
From: Jim Parker <jparker@latrade.com>
To: walker@latrade.com, dedalus@latrade.com, choy@latrade.com, rks@latrade.com,
        ppoh@latrade.com
Subject: [Fwd: Luser...errr I mean User...(lol)]

This is pretty funny.

jsp

>Date: Thu, 18 Sep 1997 15:48:51 -0400 (EDT)
>From: Jean Ellard <ellard>
>To: molloy, hogan, a220615@zulu_le0.FMR.Com, twomblys@ces.teradyne.com,
>        johnm@ces.teradyne.com, lois_paluch@notes.teradyne.com,
>        trish_sullivan@notes.teradyne.com
>Subject: Loser...errr I mean User...(lol)
>
>I got such a kick out of this....
>
>>>>>
>>>>>Actual dialog of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee:
>>>>>
>>>>>"Ridge Hall, computer assistant; may I help you?"
>>>>>"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
>>>>>"What sort of trouble?"
>>>>>"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went
>>away.",
>>>>>"Went away?"
>>>>>"They disappeared."
>>>>>"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
>>>>>"Nothing."
>>>>>"Nothing?"
>>>>>"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
>>>>>"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
>>>>>"How do I tell?"
>>>>>"Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"
>>>>>"What's a sea-prompt?"
>>>>>"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
>>>>>"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
>>>>>"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
>>>>>"What's a monitor?"
>>>>>"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have
>>a
>>>>>little light that tells you when it's on?"
>>>>>"I don't know."
>>>>>"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power
>>cord
>>>>>goes into it. Can you see that?"
>>>>>"Yes, I think so."
>>>>>"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into
>>the
>>>>>wall."
>>>>>"Yes, it is."
>>>>>"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two
>>>>>cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
>>>>>"No."
>>>>>"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other
>>>>>cable."
>>>>>"Okay, here it is."
>>>>>"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into  the back
>>of
>>>>>your computer."
>>>>>"I can't reach."
>>>>>"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
>>>>>"No."
>>>>>"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
>>>>>"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's  because it's
>>>>>dark."
>>>>>"Dark?"
>>>>>"Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in
>>from
>>>>>the window."
>>>>>"Well, turn on the office light then."
>>>>>"I can't."
>>>>>"No? Why not?"
>>>>>"Because there's a power outage."
>>>>>"A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked  now. Do you
>>>>>still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came
>>in?"
>>>>>"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
>>>>>"Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up  just like it
>>>>was >when you got it. Then take it back to  the store you bought it
>>from."
>>>>>"Really? Is it that bad?"
>>>>>"Yes, I'm afraid it is."
>>>>>"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
>>>>>"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."
------- End of Forwarded Message