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(meteorobs) (Humor) Wave of the Future in Meteorics? ;>


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Date: Mon, 06 Jul 1998 08:49:59 -0400
From: Gilayn Gramer Halil <a046340t@bc.seflin.org>
Subject: Joke -- Chrysler-Benz Merger (fwd)

 Directors at Daimler Benz and Chrysler have announced an agreement to
 adopt English as the preferred language for communications, rather
 than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the
 negotiations, Directors at Chrylser conceded that English spelling had
 some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year phase in plan.
 In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft "c".

 Also, the hard "c" will be replased with "k".  Not only will this
 klear up konfusion, but komputers kan have one less letter.  There
 will be growing kompany enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
 troublesome "ph" will be replased by "f".  This will make words like
 "fotograf" 20 persent shorter.

 In the third year, Daimler-Khrylser akseptanse of the new spelling kan
 be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated shanges are
 possible. Daimler-Khrysler will enkourage the removal of double
 letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.  Also,
 al wil agre that the horible mes of silent "e"s in the languag is
 disgrasful, and they would go.

 By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
 "th" by "z" and "w" by "v".

 During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be droped from vords
 kontaining "ou", and similar shanges vud of kors be aplid to al ozer
 kombinations of leters.

 After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl.  Zer vil be
 no mor trubls or difikultis and employes vil find it ezi to komunikat
 viz ech ozer.

 Ov korse al supliers vil be expekted to svitsh to zis for al busines
 komunikation vis Daimler-Khrysler.

 Ze drem vil finali kum tru.

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